Complicated Love. Wife. Girlfriend.......

What a mess. The situation is like this. I have been married for 6 years. My wife and I were together since high school. We have had a complicated and troubled marriage for the last 7-8 years. We have a beautiful 5 year old daughter together. Last September, we separated due to endless fighting. It was bad for our daughter. We were attempting to council our way through it and had little luck. FYI. I am not cold or emotionless. I figure straight statements are the best way to get the story out. Anyhow. I re-connected with a girl I had known 15 years ago. We went out, as friends, and had an incredible connection. we had never been romantic in any way, but we always had a connection. We saw each other a few more times after. one night, we slept together. We ended up falling in love, and carrying on an affair. This has been going on for a year now. During the time her and i were together, I was ambivalent about my situation and both relationships. I felt the need to try to salvage my marriage, while being selfishly drawn to my girlfriend. I never gave the attention required to have a real relationship to my GF. I never put the work into or dropped my GF either. I was half trying to put the marriage back together. My wife had changed, a lot. She really got her issues under control, in the interest of restoring the marriage. i, on the other hand, only made things worse. Fast forward to a month ago. My side relationship had basically failed due to my lies and deceit. I just wasnt available. Clearly, i should have made an actual decision a yer ago. I should not have let this happen. But alas, it did. The GF and I had said enough one night. We did send text megs. a bit after though. Days later, i was make a concerted effort in my marriage. I confessed the details of the affair and was working on the restoration. My wife and i agreed that because i was still in love with my GF, I needed to call her and tell her what i was doing. I called her from my house, with my wife there. I told her i was putting my life back together with my wife. My girlfriend was crushed. i had spit in her face. The whole time her and i were together, I was filing for divorce and all. i was not going back as far as she knew. I came out with the truth to her to. my wife and I just fell to pieces again too. The affair was just too much for her and us to overcome. And truthfully, i am madly in love with another woman. It's really shameful, but it just is. So now, i am separated, again and have a formal arrangement in place. My girlfriend and i have been seeing each other. Saturday night, she just said she cant do it anymore. my arrangement for custody places me at the wife's house every other weekend and two nights a week. My wife is elsewhere while I'm there. My GF is so hurt and torn. She wanted a real part in my life a year ago. And now that I can, she said it's too little too late. But, we're still in contact. She blew up about my never acknowledging the pain I caused her when I called to tell her I had gone back to my wife. I tried to, i though I had, but clearly it was not enough. Now, I'm trying to show her, through my perseverance, that i love her and want to make us legitimate. She really is amazing, wonderful, caring and smart. She is not a homewrecker. I really mislead her most of the time. <y marriage was toxic, and bad for my child. So, what do I do. She is basically saying that she cant do this now that she had to tall me what i needed to say and do for her. She cant carry on the remembrance of that phone call forever. i really do have a lot to offer her now, and she cant see it. Do I let her go? I know I sound like a low-life cheater. I am on many levels. i HAVE become that guy. i am not though. I want to make things right. i am brutally honest and upfront now. I want to do the right thing. I should have never allowed myself to fall in love with another woman, while married. it happened though. Now what? I truly want her to be my life. Do I just let her go? Is she testing/trying to see what I'm made of? Is she simply angry and hurt and trying to navigate HER feelings? HELP....