Mother problems and Over-stressed

My mother and I used to have a pretty good relationship. We hardly ever fought. But lately, I am to my wits end about everything.
From my point of view, she has a problem with every single little thing I do. No matter what I do, it is wrong. Usually it's "you shouldn't do this" "you should do this" "Why didn't you do this" "Why did you do that" "See, you should have listened to me" "I told you" etc

In her point of view, I am always getting mad at her. She can never talk to me

She is always talking AT me and never WITH me. So now, all I do is tell her, I don't want to talk and if she continues, half the time I end up yelling at her.

I have tried my hardest to explain to her calmly that I can't stand it when she does this. She does it every day. She says she can never talk to me because I get upset, and yet I am telling her why, and she still does it. For example: Today I was telling her how I feel when she talks to me. I explained to her that I can't stand it when she tells me what to do, how to do it, with comments somewhere in there in a "I told you so" fashion... half way through the conversation she says, "you need to talk to your daughter nicer..." WHAT? SERIOUSLY??? She wasn't even listening to a damn word I was saying!!!

My friend pointed out to me recently she never even praises me or motivates me or push me to better myself. Example, I am a hard worker, I stay late at work a lot to help out plus I need the money. When i got in the car, I said that I was tired the first words out of her mouth are "Well that is your own fault you shouldn't have stayed late" All I said was I was tired... I wasn't complaining, I wasn't asking her to watch my daughter so I could rest, I wasn't doing anything but stating a fact because I was just that, tired. Why is there a fault to that? I busted my ass to get my work done and all I get is "it's your own fault"? Not "you are such a hard worker" or "I would be too" nothing. Hell, I would be fine with silence, I don't need praise, i am a big girl, but come on, why do you always have something negative?

Another example: My friend was telling me about this job that pays $12/hour (I make $9/hr) saying I should apply for the position, the first thing my mom says is "she can't do that"

I am 22, I pay half the rent, all of the electric, water, phone, internet, and cable. Plus I buy food sometimes and I pay her bills sometimes, so it isn't like I am an irresponsible adult. I take care of myself, my daughter, her, and I am supporting a friend at the moment. I had over 4000 dollars in savings and almost all of it is gone because I had surgery recently and paid for it out of my own pocket (it wasn't much, just the $400 down), I have loaned my friend almost $2500, I have paid my moms bills (including rent) with that money. I wanted to move out for the past 4 years but everytime I don't because my mom pretty much begs me to stay another year. I feel bad for her and say I will stay and help her another year. I REALLY wish I would have moved last august. Our relationship has gotten so bad, I can't stand to be in the same room with her anymore.

Not to mention the house is always a mess, I am the only person that cleans it, I am the only person that takes care of the animals, my daughters father isn't around and doesn't pay jack squat to help out. I hate coming home anymore. My daughter has been getting on my nerves because her grandmother babies her all the time. Anytime I try to discipline her, she runs to my mother screaming and hollering until grandma saves her. So no matter what I do, the whole purpose is defeated, and trust me, I have to talked to my mom about this as well. In the past few months, I have gained another 15 pounds. I keep trying to lose weight, but no matter what I do, I keep gaining more and more. There is so much more that has been stressing me out but this is long enough.